Previously I’ve talked about how the mind works and the difference between the conscious and subconscious and how often people know what they want to do, change or achieve, but they just don’t seem to be able to do it and that’s because of your mindset, how you mind is programmed.
This has nothing to do with intelligence, desire, or even motivation. The number one thing holding you back and stopping you from being the best you can be is your Mindset, you programming and your own B.S… your internal belief system.
Yet most people go through life unaware they can change their mindset, or how they can do it!
We are programmed by our own experiences, our upbringing, parents, teachers, siblings, friends and other significant people in our life. Even marketing and advertising, we are constantly being bombarded by it, influencing our programming the decisions and choices we make
But sometimes we reach a point in our life where we are thinking, feeling, acting and behaving in a way, that’s no longer appropriate, for our benefit or in alignment for where we are in our life now.
Once you realise you’re running to out of date programming, there’s many ways to programme your mind. Your mind is constantly being programmed from birth until this day. But most of the time it happens by chance, as a result of the circumstance of our life experiences, learning and conditioning. Sometimes we learn things on purpose, but quite often our habits, behaviours and beliefs are formed by chance.
As powerful as the subconscious mind is, it doesn’t distinguish between what’s right, wrong, good or bad, it just assumes because you keep thinking, feeling and behaving in a certain way, then that must be what you want.
And this may well have been an appropriate way of thinking, or feeling once, but just because it was appropriate response once, it doesn’t mean you have to keep on doing it.
It’s a bit like technology – a computer, TV, a mobile phone – the 1st one you ever used, it was amazing for its time, but if you had to try and use it today, it wouldn’t function how you would want it to, it would struggle to do the things that phones and computers can do today. And often we’re the same, it’s like the software of our neck top computer has become out of date and we need to re-programme it and update it. It’s not right or wrong, it’s just become out of date for where you in your life.
Here’s a few examples that I’ve often come across working with my clients;
Food/drink – often people turn to food and drink during hard/stressful times, but once the circumstances improve or change, they’re often left with the habit of over eating/drinking. And the more they try to stop, or cut down the more they hink about it and often they end up drinking or eating more.
Smoking – smoker’s may have started smoking for social reasons, to fit in with their peers, or because advertising said it was cool. But now smoking has gone full circle and become anti-social and known to be harmful to our health. Most smokers who want to stop aren’t particularly enjoying it anymore, they’re just doing it out of habit. So whilst consciously they understand it’s unhealthy and harmful to them, they have trained and conditioned themselves to smoke X number a day, as certain times, in response to certain things. So they have the habit and programming of smoking and similarly to food and drink, the mor ethey try to stop or cut down, it just makes them think about it and want one even more. If smoker’s want to stop effectively, and they don’t seem to be able to do it on their ownm then you have to change your programming, your mindset.
Money – I’ve worked with many people of the years, who have experienced financial hardship, business financial difficulties, bankruptcy, or even growing up in hard times struggling to survive with not much money. They’ve experienced really difficult and very stressful times, and once they’ve overcome it, come through the other side, often built new businesses that have been even more financially successful and secure, yet they still have money problems and worries, because they’re still running to the out of date conditioning and programming from the hard times they experienced. A classic of example of the need to update their mindset from poverty consciousness to prosperity consciousness.
Sports – I work with a lot of sport people helping them with sports performance coaching, and the number of times people have had blocks around playing certain shots, grounds/venues, players, or teams. I’ve also had players who have experienced an injury and once they are fully fit, they then find themselves holding back, or have some kind of block about playing to their full potential because of the risk of getting injured again.
Public speaking – Many of us have uncomfrotable memories of reading out loud or having to standing up and reading in class when we were younger at school, or presenting for the first time, either on stage, in a job interview or work presentation, it may have been appropriate to feel different, or nervous at one time, as it was the unknown and uncomfortable once. But just because you felt like that once doesn’t mean you have to keep feeling that way in your life now.
These responses have just become out of date.
Once you reach a point when you recognise you’re thinking, feeling or behaving in a way that no longer for your benfit, then there are many different ways to re-learn and re-programme your mind, you just have to find a way or combination of ways that work best for you.
As a consultant hypnotherapist and performance coach, it’s what I help people to do, day in day out. Obviously you can invest in getting some personal 1-2-1 help, but there are many ways you can also help yourself.
I often liken it to physical fitness and developing the physical body. You can buy a book, watch some videos, and do it yourself, or you can go to the gym, or you can even invest in some personal training. But you don’t read a fitness magazine, or watch some video tutorials and then expect it to just happen. Or you don’t go for a walk, or visit the gym once and then expect to reach your peak fitness and the results last forever. You can always work on developing your mindset and there’s always more you can do to enhance it – I like to call it Mind Fitness.
Here’s a few ways you can help yourself develop your minds fitness;
Goal Setting – First and most importantly you have to decide what you want, what is your definition of success.
Imagine the mind is like a GPS/Sat Nav system, it’s only as good as the programming you give it, there’s no point programming your GPS/Sat Nav where you don’t want to go, in order to get to where you want to go, you first have to programme it to go to that destination you want to go to.
Repetition – Repetition is the mother of all mastery, so let’s not overlook the power of repetition, conscious effort, will power, and sheer determination. You absolutely can re-programme your mind this way. It is often said it takes between 7 – 30 days or repetitions of doing something, for it to become a habit. The challenge is, most people aren’t that patient and give up before the change occurs. Or because of the difference in strength between the conscious and subconscious, the resistance is often too great and the mind defaults to taking the path of least resistance and keeps doing what it’s always done. Which is why this is often the most difficult way to make changes and your need to take a different approach!
Once your mind knows what you actually want, and you programme it accordingly, it will do everything it can to help you continue to move in that direction.
Mind Your Language – become aware of your self-talk and the language you use. Choose your thoughts wisely, stop negative thoughts and replace them with more empowering thoughts. Choose to think positively and use clean empowering language, rather than just leaving your thoughts to chance.
Fuel your mind – just like an athlete has to fuel their body, you can re-educate and re-programme your mind by fuelling it with good sources of fuel. You can do this with books, Audio programmes, video – inspiring and motivational YouTube video, training courses and workshops. This also includes the music you listen to the, TV programmes you watch, the news you read. Choose to fuel your mind with the best sources of fuel you can.
Guided assistance – Guided meditation, guided visualisation, guided relaxation, guided self – hypnosis – like the audio programmes I have created. There are many different approaches to help guide your mind in the direction you want it go.
Expert assistance – get some professional assistance, seek out someone who can help you achieve the outcome you desire, it may be a coach, a mentor, a therapist, or someone who has already achieved and walked the path you’re on.
Environment – change your environment, this maybe your physical environment, it could be the people in your environment, it’s often been said we are a reflection of the 5 people we spend the most time with. But if they aren’t very supportive and encouraging, this is going to impact your mindset, so choose to spend more time with people who are going to lift and empower you.
What goes on in your mind… your thoughts, your emotions, impacts everything you do, the feelings you have the decisions you make, the actions you take and ultimately, the quality of the life you enjoy… Is it time for you to re-programme your mind for success in your life?
So there’s a few ideas and strategies to help you, to help you re-programme your mind for success and remember what ever success means to you…
Nothing changes until you change your way of thinking about it… Change your thinking and everything follows!
Choose and decide to programme you mind on purpose, for the success and the life that you want.
Go on you can do it!
All the best
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X Factor Finalist 2013
WKC World Kickboxing Champion